The Willow
by ichibanseiken
Summary: Everyone likes to confide in the ever-silent Nanao-chan.  Angst.


The Willow.

Ise Nanao wasn't quite sure why she felt so utterly drained. The feeling was sudden and all-encompassing. The figures in her ledger no longer lined up with precision, the chair seemed too hard all of a sudden and the air's mustiness was not helped by Matsumoto Rangiku's floral perfume.

"So I told him it was too much. Our division should never pay this sort of money for something we could easily requisition, and you know what he told me?" The blonde tossed her generous, wavy mane over her shoulder, her hands gesticulating.

"Taichou said I had to fill out C-2094 _and _F-8310 and submit them _simultaneously._ And," and her "and" was heavy with exasperated accent, "And he said I had to dig up all the documentation from last year's requisition to do that. Do you know how long that will take?"

Ise Nanao remained seated, brush in her hand, her eyes peering through her elegant, oval glasses. She didn't dare encourage the 10th division fukutaichou to elaborate further. Part of her mind tuned her out, thinking of the work awaiting her on her desk. It would take her till the end of the week to review those evaluations and submit them to Kyoraku-taichou, and then…

Silently, her long finger slid up her nose to adjust her glasses.

"…so anyway I found out my friend's cousin's pregnant and they are concerned, you know, since her last pregnancy was so difficult and I can't even bear thinking about what could happen, she's like a sister to me…" Pink lips moved in elaborate synchrony, eyelashes batted, eyes danced. The rounded behind propped against a bureau, Matsumoto-fukutaichou's stream of woe poured forth, eroding her patience like a stream. Ise Nanao felt that sudden, bloated feeling in her belly loosen as, with a cramp, her monthly visitor announced her presence.

"Excuse me, please." She rose to attend to her needs.

She returned to find Kiyone Kotetsu waiting by the door of her office. Ise Nanao peered at her over the rim of her glasses, adjusting them with her still-moist hands. Tea would be nice, she thought. But only after Kiyone leaves or else she'd be here forever.

"Nanao-san, you'd never guess what Sentaro did to me just now. He's doing all he possibly can to undermine my position with Ukitake-taichou. The gall of him…"

Ise Nanao didn't reach her desk while listening to Kiyone's melodious voice. Part of her mind tuned her out once again.

"I see…" she nodded as she reached for a watering can. She filled it in the little kitchenette and walked to the window, watering the bonsai tree. Then the orchids. Then the rubber plant. She moved from plant to plant with slow, deliberate precision. If she timed her activity just right, Kiyone would be done talking about Sentaro's slights by the time her task was finished. She lifted her eyes to the younger woman. Perhaps she could confide in her about this other thing that was bothering her. Maybe it's not so bad to talk to others…Rangiku does it, Isane does it, Kiyone is still doing it. Yet as she was about to open her mouth, Kiyone looked over her shoulder in alarm. "I better get going. Thank you for listening, Nanao-san. I just wanted to give you an update."

The feeling of sudden abandonment receded in favor of welcome solitude. Ise Nanao prepared her tea and drank it. Then she instructed lower seats as to their duties. She shut the door, pretending she just wasn't there.

She was gone.

Busy.

Unavailable.

Only half an hour later, Yachiru's pink hair lit up her open window.  
>"Nanao-chan!"<p>

The diminutive 11th division fukutaichou climbed in.

"Why didn't you use the door?" Ise Nanao asked, her body motionless.

"You locked it!"

"I locked it for a reason."

"But I want to tell you about Mashiro. She's so mean. She said she was visiting Kensei but she really just wants to annoy Kenny."

Ise Nanao couldn't remain immume against the uncharacteristic, impending wail which threatened to emanate from Yachiru's throat.

"Annoy him how, Yachiru?"  
>"She took his bells! And he got mad and he chased her! And she laughed!"<p>

"She just wants attention," Ise Nanao sighed. "Don't worry about it, Yachiru."

"But – but – but he's _my_ Ken-chan."

"Of course." The rivalry between Yachiru and Mashiro had stretched over a period of weeks and Ise Nanao didn't have the heart to just tune her out like she tuned out Rangiku and Kiyone.

"Go play with Ikkaku. Ken-chan doesn't like to be annoyed. He'll be back once he retrieves his bells."

Yachiru's whole face lit with a smile. "You called Zaraki-taichou Ken-chan!" She jumped out the window, leaving Ise Nanao to her paperwork and to that hot, flushed feeling in her cheeks. She would have liked to discuss the dating potential of Zaraki Kenpachi with Matsumoto Rangiku, but the 10th division fukutaichou was busy with paperwork and a gossip besides. She would have liked to have asked Kiyone Kotetsu – but with Kiyone it was all about her and her rivalry with her co-3rd seat. She couldn't have asked Yachiru. Isane, maybe?

A knock on the door frame disturbed her thoughts, bringing the person she was just thinking of.  
>"Ise-fukutaichou, could I please trouble you with a small issue…"<p>

Ise Nanao got to hear all about Isane's disastrous date from the previous night. She didn't really have much to say, didn't even manage to get a word in edgewise. This was surely no time for her to bring up her fairly bothersome issue.

"I have to go now. I'll let you know how it went." Ise Nanao nodded at the departing 4th division fukutaichou.

Standing up, she gathered the filled-out documents and piled them in the protective covers of her ledger. It took her several tries before she located Kyoraku-taichou. He was solitary, his somber and lightly bearded face brightening at the sight of her.

"And how is my Nanao-chan?"

"These forms require your approval and signature."

"Ahhh, Nanao, is that any way to greet your captain?" He moved the sekkat back on his head, his smile not reaching his smile. "If you only knew…" Nanao sank to her knees, producing the requisite forms and Kyoraku-taichou's writing kit and stamp. She presented a form after form, her graceful fingers busied with useful work while part of her mind tuned him out in self-defense.

She couldn't take other peoples' complaints any more.

"Thank you, taichou."

He groped her calf as she walked past him, and she whacked his shoulder with her fan.

"Ah, my beloved Nanao-chan is so cruel!"

_Your fucking Nanao-chan has fucking cramps, asshole._

Her mental outburst alerted her to the fact that perhaps, just this once, she could seek relief from the 4th division. Once there, she might talk to Unohana-taichou a bit. Unohana-taichou was always so understanding, so patient, so kind. Their mutual professional respect spilled over, filling them with a warm feeling.

Ise Nanao knocked on the door-frame of Unohana-taichou's office. The older woman's face lifted to meet hers, but the customary smile was somehow lacking in radiance.

_Not her, too._

"I'm so glad to see you, Ise-fukutaichou. Would you care for some tea?"

Unwilling to decline such a civilized offer, Ise Nanao nodded.

Unohana-taichou sighed. "It's been one of these days."

"Quite."

"Not you, too?"

"My day started out well enough." Ise Nanao halted, hesitant to divulge all of her troubles in one fell swoop. Surely nobody deserved such an onslaught of bad feelings – even if one was as patient as Unohana-taichou.

"I'm glad you had a good start. I only wish I could say the same for myself…"

Sipping tea with polite attentiveness, Ise Nanao fought not to scream inside. Judging from prior experience, it would be at least half an hour before she could make her excuses without leaving in a state of unseemly haste.

She escaped the fourth division, her wicked cramps untreated as her long legs strode away from the buildings and across the compound toward a small river. She was fuming, her pale cheeks tinged red. The ledger weighed heavily under her arm and her glasses kept sliding down her perspiring nose. She navigated past the buildings of the 11th division and cut back around a copse of trees behind the 9th division's headquarters. The ground sloped down some. She was almost blinded by the reflections of the westering sun, its reddish light skipping over the water and flickering through the trees.

Ise Nanao looked around before she emerged from the protection of the foliage. She was alone. Crossing the still-warm grass, she headed toward the old, stately willow by the riverbank. Never guessing she'd ever do such a thing, she threw the ledger onto the ground hard enough for little clouds of dust to rise.

She didn't care.

Toeing the thick volume toward the tree, she sat on it, leaning her back against the rough bark. Long, graceful branches reached to the grass around her, to the water's surface by her feet.

It was just her and the willow.

Kindred spirits.

They listened to others, unspeaking and silent.

Ise Nanao removed her glasses to daub the corners of her eyes with a cotton hankerchief.

"…I still have cramps – even Unohana was too preoccupied with problems of her own."

"…Rangiku's been the worst whiner and I never even got to tell her about my father dying…"

"…Kiyone's jockeying for position again and I refuse to play referee anymore... she just vomits her poison and leaves, leaving me utterly spent. I can't possibly burden her with the infighting in my own division…"

"…Isane has least _had _a bad date experience. I hoped to ask her how to encourage – ehm – this one guy to ask me out, but she ran out of time…"

"…Yachiru's insanely jealous of anyone going near Ken-chan, and much could be said about me…"

She gathered her knees to her chest and bent her head forward, hiding her face in her knees. Glasses off, she let her tears flow, the gently splashes of the river concealing any sounds she might have made.

The willow listened to her, unspeaking and silent.


End file.
